Forrest Craver forrestecraver at gmail.com
Tue Jun 22 08:40:38 CDT 2010



I was so weary of the world, I was so sick of it,
Everything was tainted with myself
Skies, trees, flowers, birds, water
People, houses, streets, vehicles, machines
Nations, armies, war, peace making
Work, recreation, governing, anarchy.
It was all tainted with myself.
I knew it all to start with because it was all myself

When I gathered flowers, I knew it was myself plucking my own flowering
When I went in a train, I knew it was myself traveling by my own invention
When I heard the cannon of war, I listened with my own ears to my own
When I saw the torn dead, I knew it was my own torn dead body.

It was all me. I had done it all in my own flesh.
I shall never forge the maniacal horror of it all in the end
When everything was me, I knew it all already. I anticipated it all in my
Because I was the author and the result

I was the God and the creation at once
Creator, I looked at my creation
Created, I looked at myself, the creator
It was a maniacal horror in the end.

At last came death, sufficiency of death. And that at least relieved me. I
I buried my believed. It was good. I buried myself and was gone
God but it was good to have died and been trodden quite out, quite out,
quite out
Every vestige gone.

Then I am here
Risen and setting my foot in another world
Risen, accomplishing a resurrection
Risen, not born again but risen, body the same as before

New beyond knowledge of newness. Alive beyond life
Living where life was never yet dreamed of, not hinted at

Here, in the other world, still terrestrial
Myself the same as before, yet unaccountably new
I, in the sour black tomb, trodden to absolute death

I put my hand out in the night, one night, and my hand
Touched that which was verily was not me,
Verily it was not me

Where I had been was a sudden blaze
A sudden flaring blaze.
So I put my hand out further, a little further
And I felt that which was not I.
It verily was not I
It was the Unknown

Ha! I was a blaze leaping up
I was a tiger bursting into sunlight
I was greedy. I was mad for the unknown

I was risen, resurrected, starved from the tomb
Starved from a life of devouring always myself
Now here was I, new awakened with my hand stretching out
And touching the unknown, the real unknown
The unknown unknown!

EXTRACT SUMMARY OF D. H. Lawrence   by Forrest Craver *
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