[Dialogue] Town Meeting

[Lucille Chagnon]

What Story are you Enacting? 
written by, Steve Davis 

How much of your life is directed from the foundation of unexamined mythology? What if we are all enacting some sort of story in our lives? Now what do I mean by story? I mean that we have some vision, set of ideas, or beliefs about ourselves that define us as a central character in what could be called a "myth" or "story" that we're living out. All of the elements of the story have been either passed down as part of our culture or upbringing, intuited, or we've just plain made up. We then go about enacting our stories as if they were true, thus embodying the script from which we live our lives. 

So now you may say, "yes I can certainly buy that, I'm very well aware that we are a product of our own thoughts and beliefs. So what's the big deal?" The big deal is this. The vast majority of us don't know that we're enacting a story. We actually think this is real life that we're living! (see the movie The Matrix for a great metaphor). By real life, I mean that we're approaching life based on a set of assumptions that aren't necessarily backed by good evidence. So when you don't know that you're enacting a story, you are completely at its mercy with little control over the role you play and the course it takes. 

The story we enact often comes to us piecemeal and/or non-verbally. It may include the stuff we "read between the lines," and unexamined assumptions. If you were to examine each single element of your story by itself, it might appear obvious to you, even if you'd never articulated it before. If all the elements, however, were collected and given voice so that they were presented to your conscious awareness, you might be very surprised at what you find. In fact, you may be shocked to the point you would want to forget the story entirely. 

Now to make matters even more complicated, in addition to enacting our own individual stories, we are also part of stories which are bigger than us. We are enacting stories within our relationships with individuals, and the groups we are involved in, such as our families, work groups, community organizations, our countries, etc. Even our civilization itself is acting out a story, much of which we may not even be aware. 

As a facilitator, you will encounter groups who are troubled, often because they are enacting an unexamined story whose course they feel powerless to alter. Helping them unravel their story will grant them power over it. In other words, until you know you're an author, you cannot change what you're writing. 

Application
I propose that we will enact whatever story we choose to adopt as our own, and will settle for the best one available. If we don't take the time to create a better one, we'll continue enacting our current story, even if it isn't working all that well for us. 

Discover your story
Whether you're working with a group or an individual, ask them to assume they're enacting a story. Now based on this assumption, have them uncover the elements of their story. Ask them to be detectives, hunting for clues. Looking at their behaviors alone, have them describe the story they are living, piece by piece, until the "whole" story emerges. 

Evaluate your story
Now have them assess their story. Ask them if this is a story they are happy with. What would they change, remove, or add to this story if it was ideal? Help the group come to consensus on the authoring of the grandest story they can envision. A story that inspires every member of the group. 

Tell your story
Facilitate a commitment from all group members to begin sharing their new story amongst themselves and with other important people in their lives. Encourage individuals to talk about their specific role in the story and why it appeals to them. The more they talk about their new story, the more it will become a part of them. 

Rehearse your new role
Finally, encourage individuals to commit to living their new role in some way. Ask them to commit to making a change or changes in alignment with the new story they wish to enact. Assign a "narrator" for the group that will report the unfolding of the new story each week. The group may even assign a "story time" where they explore what kind of changes are taking place and the challenges that are showing up as they attempt to enact this new story. 

Steve Davis publishes the Master Facilitator Journal, weekly offering free tools, tips, and skills to support anyone who works with groups. Read by trainers, coaches, consultants, teachers, leaders, and facilitators. Visit www.masterfacilitatorjournal.com to find out more.