[Dialogue] Respectful Dialogue?

Carolyn Antenen cantenen at mac.com
Mon Oct 22 07:22:31 EDT 2007


Ethicist Randy Cohen of the New York Times states that when someone  
makes derogatory remarks about another -
it is hurtful and damaging to the other person.  At this point it is  
no longer an issue of etiquette
(you can’t just brush it off as a joke or a harmless insensitive  
comment).
It is a matter of ethics and we all have an obligation to stand up  
against thoughtless, prejudicial and racist comments.

We have a responsibility to clearly state and respond unambiguously  
to stereotypical and offensive remarks.

When we decided to become members of the ICA community - we did so  
because we thought this group respected
and valued diversity and every individual’s worth.  We would hate to  
think - that this image is just a public screen.

That below the surface as a community we allow and even support the  
kind of behavior as exhibited in some emails.

We may think that what occurred was between a closed group of  
people.  In fact many people on these list serves falsely think
they are having private conversations that have no accountability to  
the rest of the world.
That if they publicly support “caring for the excluded” then what  
they truly believe is not relevant.

We are here to say that is not so – we will stand up against these  
ill-thought and discriminatory statements.

Imagine how these messages feel to a person who is targeted.
Imagine how the rest of the world receives these messages.

It is not always easy to stand up for what we believe.  But ICA has a  
long history of declaring respect for all persons and all cultures.
It is our hope that we can continue to do so.

Carolyn Houpt Antenen, Suganya Sockalingam, and Kathleen Joyce



On Oct 19, 2007, at 6:39 PM, W. J. wrote:

>
> Take a guess and you have a 25% chance of getting it right (unless  
> you're the latest newbie running the Kemper Building and threfore  
> assumed the correct answer is obviously #2).
>
> Marshall
>
>
> David Walters <walters at alaweb.com> wrote:
> Take The Quiz!
>
> If you have found this page, then you may be looking for someone.  
> Someone you knew a long time ago but lost track of.
> It's quite possible that the people you are looking for are also  
> looking for you.
>
> take the quiz, send your answers to the blog owner via e-mail &  
> we'll be in touch. It's multiple choice, or course.

>  Yes, he's a 'corporate' Oreo black like the last black interim ED.  
> I took one look and instantly said to myself, "Oh, one of those  
> guys." Meaning a certain mindset. And of course he doesn't have a  
> clue.
> M.
>
>
> Richard Alton <dick_alton at hotmail.com> wrote:
> And he is black! Dick
>
> Richard H.T. Alton International Consultants and Associates  
> 'building global bridges' 166 N. Humphrey Ave, Apt, 1N Oak Park, IL  
> 60302 T:1.773.344.7172 richard.alton at gmail.com Don't let the fear  
> of striking out hold you back Babe Ruth
>
> Terry, you've made my point beautifully. I totally agree with your  
> perspective, and I'm very sorry the Board chose not to offer you  
> the position. Personally, I'm afraid it was another huge mistake.
>
> I also have to apologize to my colleagues on this list for my  
> intemperate language. Although the truth of my instantaneous "read"  
> on Mr. Tillman is accurately stated (in other words, that's what I  
> really think!), I didn't intend my unedited comments to go to this  
> list. I got a very brief message from Alton and hit the reply  
> button without noticing that it came thru the listserv! And I'm not  
> at all sure Dick thought his comment was going out there either.
>
> Moral of this story is that you gotta read the small type, even  
> when you're bleary-eyed. Or suffer the embarrassment of telling the  
> world your personal 'truth.' Unlike certain politicians, however,  
> I'm not gonna spin it or try to slide out of it.
>
> I've tried to avoid intemperate or hostile language in commenting  
> on the ICA-USA board's actions. But sometimes you gotta call a  
> spade a spade. It's clear that there's been an intentional cut-off  
> or wipe-out of the previous corporate memory, and they've pushed  
> the re-boot button without being able to predict whether anything  
> will be accessible on the hard drive, so to speak.
>
> Instead of taking responsibility for guarding both the depth and  
> wisdom of our 'corporate culture', as well as the financial  
> viability of the ICA-USA and the vision and direction the staff was  
> pursuing, they made the staff the 'bad guys' and wiped them out.  
> The board did not admit their own failures and hold themselves  
> accountable to their historic (and aging) constituency.
>
> Instead, they are attempting to re-invent the organization, almost  
> from scratch, and position it to serve a newly defined constituency  
> and mission that may have little in common with ICA's in twenty- 
> nine other nations.
>
> That, I fear, presents a difficult and challenging discontinuity,  
> as well as a significant organizational issue: for ICAI, for "the  
> ICA brand" (to use corporate lingo), which carries an immense sense  
> of historical continuity or "who we are", and, finally, for those  
> of us whose lives have been so deeply marked by who we were.
>
> Do we have anything to do with, or say to, this "new ICA"? Have  
> they redefined themselves to include or exclude us?
>
> If ICA-USA were a membership organization (like a union), then the  
> voting members would elect the board, who would be accountable to  
> its constituency. But it's not, folks. So they basically can do  
> anything they want that doesn't drive them into insolvency. They  
> have to be amenable to major funders, of course, but if their  
> grassroots base of small donors has dried up, then they don't have  
> to worry about what we think.
>
> So, that's what I really think. Having said that, it's clear that  
> they've made their decision, and maybe it's time to stop  
> complaining,  sniping, and taking pot shots at obviously flawed  
> decision making. Like marching into Iraq and hanging Saddam  
> Hussein, it's a done deal, and now we have to live with it.
>
> Marshall
>
> I would be very happy with an executive director who happened to  
> grow up in Fifth City and was a graduate of the Fifth City  
> Preschool. That would be a plus. But I'm sure Mr. Tillman has had  
> other life experiences that have sensitized him to issues of  
> poverty and marginalization. As part of the group marginalized by  
> the board, I hope Mr. Tillman will be able to correct their myopia  
> and exert visionary leadership that will be challenging and  
> compelling.
>
>
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