[Dialogue] Mary Coggeshall

[RICHARD HOWIE]

Dear Everyone,
One of my fondest memories of Mary was joining her  for skinny- 
dipping in their back yard pool at the NJ house @ 6am each morning  
that I was a guest in the midst of our ICA board meetings held in the  
retreat center close-by.  What a way to greet the day, and what a way  
to meditate, and what a way to be zany together!!!
Elise, let me know if you decide to share this story at Mary's  
service.  I believe she would have a chuckle, and no wonder she was  
able to stay calm in every circumstance!  Let's hear it for early  
morning swims!
Love to all, Ellen
On Feb 26, 2010, at 11:56 AM, Terry Bergdall wrote:

> Thanks, Elise. I will be attending the memorial service tomorrow on  
> behalf of ICA and will be taking messages, your and others, from  
> our community to give to the family. Terry
>
>
>
> On 26 Feb 2010, at 10:36, George Packard wrote:
>
>> Dear Colleagues,
>>
>> Tomorrow is a memorial service for  Mary Coggeshall.   In honor of  
>> the many contributions that Mary made to the life and work of ICA,  
>> and knowing that many of us in the ICA network will continue to  
>> benefit from her wisdom, I share this bit of writing.
>>
>> In gratitude,
>>
>> Elise
>>
>> K. Elise Packard, Ph.D., Project Manager
>>
>> International Family Literacy Initiative
>>
>> ProLiteracy Worldwide,  www.proliteracy.org
>>
>>
>>
>> Losing Mary
>>
>> L
>> ast month I received word of Mary Coggeshall’s passing, and felt  
>> sadness at the loss of a friend and an ally in the work of peace  
>> and justice.  “Main Street Mary” had earned her name from  
>> neighbors who admired her passion for making good things happen in  
>> her own community. I knew her as someone who extended her main  
>> street to dirt roads continents away.
>>
>> I lost Mary once in Chile.  She was not lost, but I could not find  
>> her shortly after she was supposed to arrive in Santiago. She had  
>> ventured beyond the quiet  streets of New Jersey to travel to  
>> Santiago to encourage our work in a small Chilean village during  
>> the time of the Pinochet government. In the political environment  
>> of that era, people were “disappeared”; so not knowing if Mary had  
>> arrived, or where she and her friend, Retty, might be staying was  
>> unsettling.  In 1978 there were no cell phones; in fact, there  
>> were no phones at all in the village. Making a call required  
>> walking several miles into the next town to call from the  
>> municipal office.  I walked, I called hotels…..no Mary. That  
>> evening we were hosting a reception in Santiago for those who were  
>> supporting our work, so I traveled on the bus with members of our  
>> development team from the village to the city. When we entered the  
>> hotel, the site of the reception, there was Mary standing with  
>> Retty at the top of the stairs….smiling, saying “Welcome to  
>> Santiago.”  Mary was at ease, in spite of having had to find her  
>> way from the airport to the hotel without the benefit of speaking  
>> Spanish.  She was in a new place, but she was not lost.
>>
>> Mary once said that when she, Retty and I got together, you could  
>> expect the unexpected. When I was asked to meet Mary and Retty at  
>> the airport in Chicago, I was determined not to lose them. This  
>> time, with the benefit of a telephone, I was right there when they  
>> arrived, ready to pack their luggage into the car and gracefully  
>> move through Chicago traffic.  As the three of us talked about  
>> past adventures and present concerns, I noticed that we were low  
>> on gas. I was relieved to find a gas station; but in exiting the  
>> car, I noted that we had a flat tire.  Mary and Retty were game to  
>> walk to a nearby ice cream store for a treat while a mechanic  
>> changed the tire. I was flustered, Retty found it humorous, and  
>> Mary was calm.
>>
>> In fact, Mary was calm driving the New Jersey Turnpike, hosting a  
>> formal reception, sharing a cup of tea in her kitchen. Calm, but  
>> not shy about raising concerns and asking tough questions.  “Is  
>> what we are doing changing lives?”  “Are we beginning an action  
>> that will be sustained over years?”
>>
>> I will no longer be able to share a cup of tea with Main Street  
>> Mary, seeking her advice. I won’t  be able to laugh with her about  
>> old times; nor cook up plans for the future. But she is with me in  
>> the memory of her calm and her questions.  I can ask for her  
>> advice; and see her warm smile.
>>
>> We have lost Mary, but she is not lost
>>
>>                                                                       
>>                                                       Elise  
>> Packard, January 2010
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