[Oe List ...] Sakmon: MORE ON Wedding rehearsal questions . . .
William Salmon
wsalmon at cox.net
Tue May 26 11:23:17 EDT 2009
Dear All --
Just a reflection on the questions associated with our marriages. Beverly and I continue to use them at every opportunity with whoever is celebrating an anniversary. We've reduced them to just these:
1) What was significant about this last year?
2) What do you anticipate for this next year?
3) Living in the ambiguity between a cosmic Yes and No, have you been faithful to your wedding vows this past year?
In the last 15 years, and during the last 5 years of an active ministry, I found that the wedding reception could be made more meaningful, and more holy, than the wedding vows.
During the cutting of the Wedding Cake, I provided a context about the serious significance of the "wedding covenant," and its relationship to our covenant with God.
I reminded the audience, and the couple, that when a Hebrew couple wanted to get married they presented themselves to the "city dads" at the city gate. When they stated their intentions to get married, these synagogue officials asked, "Show us your covenant."
At this time they exchanged coats/cloaks as a sign of wearing each other; and exchanged purses as a symbol of accepting the resources and debts of each; they noted that the friends and the enemies of each other were accepted; they took a knife and cut into their hands a "family symbol" and co-mingled their blood; this sign in their palm also showed to others "to whom they belonged."
Then, I ask the couple to kneel behind their cake.
The couple breaks off a piece of the cake to feed each other as a sign they commit themselves to "eating each" so as to embody each within themselves; finally, they take of cup of juice or wine, and they drink from the cup of their opposite as a sign of embodying the blood of the other.
At this time, I remind the couple and the audience of the similarity to Holy Communion, or the Eucharist. I ask all who listen why it was never recorded in the Bible the resistance of the Disciples to the cannibalistic nature of this activity? Why didn't someone say, "Yech?"
The answer is that the Disciples, "on the night that Jesus was betrayed," knew exactly what was going on. The Hebrews has celebrated the process of covenanting for 2,000 years!
It is this seriousness that the couple are now taking on their relationship in this "Covenant of Marriage."
The basis of these activities is the old "Blood Covenant," and was demonstrated in the relationship between David and Jonathan.
Inner Peace. Bill Salmon
PS: It always intrigues me to see my name associated with emotional--sometimes even passionate--remarks, and then to discover they are talking about Bill with the Red Hair.
Shucks.
Pastor Bill
----- Original Message -----
From: Rod Rippel
To: Order Ecumenical Community ; Colleague Dialogue ; Springboard Dialogue
Sent: Sunday, May 24, 2009 11:49 AM
Subject: Re: [Oe List ...] Wedding rehearsal questions . . .
Jim: I don't recall any "standardized' questions for the rehearsal dinner, but I found my actual notes for the questions asked at Karen Synder and Jim Troxel's dinner, 3/10/1969:
Qns to the group of colleagues assembled:
1. What do you see going on in marriages that would make you want to get married?
2. What observe in new marriages?
3. What observe in the old marriages? (apparently directed to marr's in the Order over the past quarters.)
4. What's going on in Non-Western marriages?
5. What's going on in marriages in College 2? (dinner attendees were selected from their college.)
6. What do you see in marriages of the future?
Qns of the Troxels and the group:
7. No reason for marriage as we know it. Why are you getting married? Where are your doubts? Where the struggle?
8. What's taking place in the future for the Troxel family? What is going to happen?
Qn asked of Jim and Karen:
9. What do you see going to happen in the Troxel marriage?
Jim, hope these are helpful. I also have notes on answer given at that meal...probably not to relevant.
Rod Rippel
----- Original Message -----
From: James Wiegel
To: Order Ecumenical Community ; Colleague Dialogue ; Springboard Dialogue
Sent: Saturday, May 23, 2009 7:00 PM
Subject: [Oe List ...] Wedding rehearsal questions . . .
What were the conversation questions used as a part of the rehearsal dinner??
Jim Wiegel
If anyone tells you something strange about the world, something you had never heard before, do not laugh but listen attentively; make him repeat it, make him explain it; no doubt there is something there worth taking hold of. -- Georges Duhamel.
401 North Beverly Way
Tolleson, Arizona 85353-2401
+1 623-936-8671
+1 623-363-3277
jfwiegel at yahoo.com
www.partnersinparticipation.com
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