[Oe List ...] Sakmon: MORE ON Wedding rehearsal questions . . .
Nancy Lanphear
nancy at songaia.com
Fri May 29 15:29:58 EDT 2009
We,too, have used these questions with friends who are celebrating their
wedding anniversaries. One couple in our community who celebrates the same
day as Fred and I do, July 4th, ask us each year to hold the time open in
the morning of the 4th to share "questions" with each other.
Nancy
2009/5/26 William Salmon <wsalmon at cox.net>
> Dear All --
> Just a reflection on the questions associated with our marriages.
> Beverly and I continue to use them at every opportunity with whoever is
> celebrating an anniversary. We've reduced them to just these:
> 1) What was significant about this last year?
> 2) What do you anticipate for this next year?
> 3) Living in the ambiguity between a cosmic Yes and No, have you been
> faithful to your wedding vows this past year?
>
> In the last 15 years, and during the last 5 years of an active
> ministry, I found that the wedding reception could be made more meaningful,
> and more holy, than the wedding vows.
> During the cutting of the Wedding Cake, I provided a context about the
> serious significance of the "wedding covenant," and its relationship to our
> covenant with God.
> I reminded the audience, and the couple, that when a Hebrew couple
> wanted to get married they presented themselves to the "city dads" at the
> city gate. When they stated their intentions to get married, these synagogue
> officials asked, "Show us your covenant."
> At this time they exchanged coats/cloaks as a sign of wearing each
> other; and exchanged purses as a symbol of accepting the resources and debts
> of each; they noted that the friends and the enemies of each other were
> accepted; they took a knife and cut into their hands a "family symbol" and
> co-mingled their blood; this sign in their palm also showed to others "to
> whom they belonged."
> Then, I ask the couple to kneel behind their cake.
> The couple breaks off a piece of the cake to feed each other as a sign
> they commit themselves to "eating each" so as to embody each within
> themselves; finally, they take of cup of juice or wine, and they drink from
> the cup of their opposite as a sign of embodying the blood of the other.
> At this time, I remind the couple and the audience of the similarity
> to Holy Communion, or the Eucharist. I ask all who listen why it was never
> recorded in the Bible the resistance of the Disciples to the cannibalistic
> nature of this activity? Why didn't someone say, "Yech?"
> The answer is that the Disciples, "on the night that Jesus was
> betrayed," knew exactly what was going on. The Hebrews has celebrated the
> process of covenanting for 2,000 years!
> It is this seriousness that the couple are now taking on their
> relationship in this "Covenant of Marriage."
> The basis of these activities is the old "Blood Covenant," and was
> demonstrated in the relationship between David and Jonathan.
> Inner Peace. Bill Salmon
>
> PS: It always intrigues me to see my name associated with
> emotional--sometimes even passionate--remarks, and then to discover they are
> talking about Bill with the Red Hair.
> Shucks.
> Pastor Bill
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> *From:* Rod Rippel <rodrippel at cox.net>
> *To:* Order Ecumenical Community <oe at wedgeblade.net> ; Colleague Dialogue<dialogue at wedgeblade.net>; Springboard
> Dialogue <springboard at wedgeblade.net>
> *Sent:* Sunday, May 24, 2009 11:49 AM
> *Subject:* Re: [Oe List ...] Wedding rehearsal questions . . .
>
> Jim: I don't recall any "standardized' questions for the rehearsal
> dinner, but I found my actual notes for the questions asked at Karen Synder
> and Jim Troxel's dinner, 3/10/1969:
>
> Qns to the group of colleagues assembled:
> 1. What do you see going on in marriages that would make you want
> to get married?
> 2. What observe in new marriages?
> 3. What observe in the old marriages? (apparently directed to
> marr's in the Order over the past quarters.)
> 4. What's going on in Non-Western marriages?
> 5. What's going on in marriages in College 2? (dinner attendees
> were selected from their college.)
> 6. What do you see in marriages of the future?
>
> Qns of the Troxels and the group:
> 7. No reason for marriage as we know it. Why are you getting
> married? Where are your doubts? Where the struggle?
> 8. What's taking place in the future for the Troxel family?
> What is going to happen?
>
> Qn asked of Jim and Karen:
> 9. What do you see going to happen in the Troxel marriage?
>
> Jim, hope these are helpful. I also have notes on answer given at
> that meal...probably not to relevant.
>
> Rod Rippel
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> *From:* James Wiegel <jfwiegel at yahoo.com>
> *To:* Order Ecumenical Community <oe at wedgeblade.net> ; Colleague Dialogue<dialogue at wedgeblade.net>; Springboard
> Dialogue <springboard at wedgeblade.net>
> *Sent:* Saturday, May 23, 2009 7:00 PM
> *Subject:* [Oe List ...] Wedding rehearsal questions . . .
>
> What were the conversation questions used as a part of the rehearsal
> dinner??
>
> Jim Wiegel
>
> If anyone tells you something strange about the world, something you had
> never heard before, do not laugh but listen attentively; make him repeat it,
> make him explain it; no doubt there is something there worth taking hold of.
> -- Georges Duhamel.
>
> 401 North Beverly Way
> Tolleson, Arizona 85353-2401
> +1 623-936-8671
> +1 623-363-3277
> jfwiegel at yahoo.com
> www.partnersinparticipation.com
>
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