[Oe List ...] Saying Good-bye to Stan

[George Packard]

It was when we were driving from Atlanta to South Carolina that George and I
received the call about Stan Crow's passing.  I am still living into the
news.  George and I had the privilege of working closely with Stan in the
Student House, and years later in developing the "This Moment In Time"
retreat.  Stan was a colleague and a mentor to us, and we watched him be an
excellent father to his own children and a mentor to many others.

In the Student House Stan was an excellent team player, and the kind of guy
that you want around when you are facing challenges.  Stan's endless
creativity infused our team with a sense of possibility.  He could design
and sew costumes, build stage sets, work with 12 and 13 year olds to map out
strategies for paper delivery, figure out the essence of what needed to be
taught, and was willing to go beyond the call to figure out how to be
effective in teaching.

Stan decided to love every young person in our care.  And if 'love is a
verb", Stan demonstrated that to each in multiple ways: he tirelessly went
to school conferences, doctors' appointments, and drove the kids on shopping
trips.  He redesigned the dorms so that they would have more of a feel of
home. He worked with the students on a news letter; wrote play scripts so
that they might shine on the stage; and approached the tasks of paper
delivery, space care and meal preparation with interest, humor and zest. 

Stan got engulfed in his love for those kids, and was ecstatic about moving
the Student House to Washington state where nature could play a key role in
their experience and development.  Going into the unknown seemed to be old
hat for Stan----the more ambiguity, the more interest!  The more
confrontation with wilderness, the more self discovery.  Formation of the
inner life for people of all ages became one of his passions.

Stan was talented and humble, and he wasn't afraid of hard work and chaos.
Forging a new co-housing community while blending a new family seemed to be
exciting and life-sourcing.  Reflecting on the interior journey; the role
that nature plays in sparking inner awareness; the importance of drawing
upon the spirit practices of multiple faith traditions; the vibrancy of
poetry and song to express the human experience----all of this seemed to be
Stan's life blood.

Stan loved the yurt (the Mongolian tent-like structure) on the property of
the co-housing community that he helped develop.  It was both a structure
for meetings and storing material for the Journeys programs, but it also
became a living record of the many lives that were influenced by this work.
Stan took delight in writing every name of the young people....then the
adults....who took part in the Rite of Passage events.  Our son and
daughters' names as well as my name and George's appear on that yurt. In
participating we were helped to make critical transitions.  I survived an
Adult Wilderness Quest.  Stan had beckoned George and me to participate in
this experience that included 3 days of silence and absolute solitude in the
wilderness....a time to sort out past, present and future.  Stan prepared
the sweat lodge (including digging the rocks, building the fire, and
preparing the structure) to initiate the experience and, and he helped cook
the meal that welcomed us home.  The fact that he had also figured out the
structure of the experience and mapped the terrain and helped train the
guides is also important to mention

Stan was a Renaissance Man:  capable and humble.  My life is enriched by
having known him. In remembering Stan I will remember to laugh, to sing, and
to venture into the wilderness with faith and trust, to invest in the lives
of others......especially all our children.

K. Elise Packard 
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