[Oe List ...] Thank you Nancy Stan & your mother

jeanwatts at cox.net jeanwatts at cox.net
Mon Nov 23 10:29:32 CST 2009


Nancy, Thank you.  Sending love and light from Cyprus where I celebrate and greive the lost.  Jean Watts
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> Today's Topics:
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>    1. Life at Songaia and elsewhere! (Nancy Lanphear)
>    2. Re: Saying Good-bye to Stan (R Williams)
>    3. Re: Life at Songaia and elsewhere! (Herman Greene)
> 
> 
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> Message: 1
> Date: Mon, 23 Nov 2009 04:33:40 -0800
> From: Nancy Lanphear <nancy at songaia.com>
> Subject: [Oe List ...] Life at Songaia and elsewhere!
> To: Order Ecumenical Community <oe at wedgeblade.net>
> Message-ID:
> 	<9490e8a70911230433n1a0dcaefqa2d00ac8a46512f7 at mail.gmail.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1"
> 
> Dear Ones,
> 
> This has been a week of celebration with it's laughter, tears and lotsd of
> hugs.  Here at Songaia, we have gathered several times to celebrate the life
> and death of our dear friend, Stan Crow.  On Saturday afternoon, our larger
> Songaia community circled with stories of how Stan has impacted our lives
> while he was alive and in his death. The ROP Journeys community hosted an
> open house in our common house to allow us to share with others. The
> sudden-ness of Stan's passing has brought us into the moment, we were
> unprepared for the news.  He is missed - his words of wisdom, his cooking,
> his walks around the community, his smile, his by-line - "I know you" - each
> of these and more have reminded us of his unique and unrepeatable life.  We
> are grateful to have known and loved him.
> 
> My mother, Eleanor Marian Hoxsie Perrin, died peacefully early on Thursday
> morning, November 19th, she was 93+.  She had been ill for 2-3 weeks of
> pancreatic cancer but passed away before she had pain, only mild
> discomfort.  She died as she lived, WELL!  Our daughter Sandra and
> grand-daughter Ilaria visited Mom with me during the week of November 7th -
> 14th.  ALthough she was in hospice and was suppose to be letting go, we
> enjoyed two days of lively conversation and fun during the early part of our
> visit.  Mom loved the sun and would sit outdoors by her home whenever she
> could, even as the weather became cooler.  If there was sun to sit in, there
> she was!  As Sandy and I sat by her bedside one evening as the sun was going
> down in the West, Sandy moved Mom's bed to the window and slid into bed next
> to her. Together we watched the sun go down.   Mom was elated!  The
> following day we again moved her bed toward the setting sun and began
> singing with her.  We sang together for  30 minutes or so- laughing and
> crying at the same time.  The next day, we began a more quiet vigil and
> continued to share stories as Mom was awake, she would then drift off to
> sleep.   We said goodby on Saturday morning to return to Seattle.  I told
> Mom one more time that Fred and I loved her so very much.  She smiled up at
> me and said, " I love you, too and be sure to take good care of Fred".  Our
> time with her was precious.   She was a wonderful MOM - the best!
> 
> Back to Songaia.  Fred is experiencing much more weakness in his arms and
> more difficulty breathing.  Of course, he has the biPap machine at night and
> a "sip and puff" vent on his wheel chair during the day.  If you were to ask
> him how is is doing, he would say with a smile, "I can still sing"!   He was
> accepted into Hospice last week.  His breathing capacity is about 30% which
> makes him elegible for the hospice part of of our HMO.  This means more
> visits from the home health care nurse, social worker, and who-ever else we
> need.  Stan's death has been difficult for us all, Fred's identification
> with his death was unique as you can imagine.   He tells with delight that
> for the 3 Fridays before Stan's death, he (Stan) brought lunch to Fred while
> Marilyn and I were out doing the community shopping.  During lunch they just
> talked - since their usual relationship was "working" together on some
> project, these last days were special,  "BEING" together.  Our children and
> our larger Songaia community continue to be the best partners in our "Share
> the Care" team.  They come when needed and any other time as well.  Story
> telling is where it is at these days!
> 
> We will keep in touch.  You are all loved,
> 
> Nancy
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> ------------------------------
> 
> Message: 2
> Date: Mon, 23 Nov 2009 05:07:46 -0800 (PST)
> From: R Williams <rcwmbw at yahoo.com>
> Subject: Re: [Oe List ...] Saying Good-bye to Stan
> To: Order Ecumenical Community <oe at wedgeblade.net>
> Message-ID: <901773.29326.qm at web59313.mail.re1.yahoo.com>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1"
> 
> Elise,
> ?
> An eloquent, celebrative tribute to one who deserved to be spoken of in such a way.? Makes my day!
> ?
> Thanks,
> Randy
> 
> --- On Sun, 11/22/09, George Packard <george.packard1 at rcn.com> wrote:
> 
> 
> From: George Packard <george.packard1 at rcn.com>
> Subject: [Oe List ...] Saying Good-bye to Stan
> To: "'Colleague Dialogue'" <dialogue at wedgeblade.net>, "'Order Ecumenical Community'" <oe at wedgeblade.net>
> Date: Sunday, November 22, 2009, 6:04 PM
> 
> 
> 
> It was when we were driving from Atlanta to South Carolina that George and I
> received the call about Stan Crow's passing.? I am still living into the
> news.? George and I had the privilege of working closely with Stan in the
> Student House, and years later in developing the "This Moment In Time"
> retreat.? Stan was a colleague and a mentor to us, and we watched him be an
> excellent father to his own children and a mentor to many others.
> 
> In the Student House Stan was an excellent team player, and the kind of guy
> that you want around when you are facing challenges.? Stan's endless
> creativity infused our team with a sense of possibility.? He could design
> and sew costumes, build stage sets, work with 12 and 13 year olds to map out
> strategies for paper delivery, figure out the essence of what needed to be
> taught, and was willing to go beyond the call to figure out how to be
> effective in teaching.
> 
> Stan decided to love every young person in our care.? And if 'love is a
> verb", Stan demonstrated that to each in multiple ways: he tirelessly went
> to school conferences, doctors' appointments, and drove the kids on shopping
> trips.? He redesigned the dorms so that they would have more of a feel of
> home. He worked with the students on a news letter; wrote play scripts so
> that they might shine on the stage; and approached the tasks of paper
> delivery, space care and meal preparation with interest, humor and zest. 
> 
> Stan got engulfed in his love for those kids, and was ecstatic about moving
> the Student House to Washington state where nature could play a key role in
> their experience and development.? Going into the unknown seemed to be old
> hat for Stan----the more ambiguity, the more interest!? The more
> confrontation with wilderness, the more self discovery.? Formation of the
> inner life for people of all ages became one of his passions.
> 
> Stan was talented and humble, and he wasn't afraid of hard work and chaos.
> Forging a new co-housing community while blending a new family seemed to be
> exciting and life-sourcing.? Reflecting on the interior journey; the role
> that nature plays in sparking inner awareness; the importance of drawing
> upon the spirit practices of multiple faith traditions; the vibrancy of
> poetry and song to express the human experience----all of this seemed to be
> Stan's life blood.
> 
> Stan loved the yurt (the Mongolian tent-like structure) on the property of
> the co-housing community that he helped develop.? It was both a structure
> for meetings and storing material for the Journeys programs, but it also
> became a living record of the many lives that were influenced by this work.
> Stan took delight in writing every name of the young people....then the
> adults....who took part in the Rite of Passage events.? Our son and
> daughters' names as well as my name and George's appear on that yurt. In
> participating we were helped to make critical transitions.? I survived an
> Adult Wilderness Quest.? Stan had beckoned George and me to participate in
> this experience that included 3 days of silence and absolute solitude in the
> wilderness....a time to sort out past, present and future.? Stan prepared
> the sweat lodge (including digging the rocks, building the fire, and
> preparing the structure) to initiate the experience and, and he helped cook
> the meal that welcomed us home.? The fact that he had also figured out the
> structure of the experience and mapped the terrain and helped train the
> guides is also important to mention
> 
> Stan was a Renaissance Man:? capable and humble.? My life is enriched by
> having known him. In remembering Stan I will remember to laugh, to sing, and
> to venture into the wilderness with faith and trust, to invest in the lives
> of others......especially all our children.
> 
> K. Elise Packard 
> 
> -----Inline Attachment Follows-----
> 
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> ------------------------------
> 
> Message: 3
> Date: Mon, 23 Nov 2009 09:19:29 -0500
> From: "Herman Greene" <hfgreene at mindspring.com>
> Subject: Re: [Oe List ...] Life at Songaia and elsewhere!
> To: "'Order Ecumenical Community'" <oe at wedgeblade.net>
> Message-ID: <3E92D05F35DF45BB83BBBC08C2CDBD96 at HERMAND>
> Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
> 
> Thanks so much Nancy. I am with you in your losses and with Fred in his
> fragile, singing, living.
> 
>  
> 
> Herman
> 
>  
> 
>   _____  
> 
> From: oe-bounces at wedgeblade.net [mailto:oe-bounces at wedgeblade.net] On Behalf
> Of Nancy Lanphear
> Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 7:34 AM
> To: Order Ecumenical Community
> Subject: [Oe List ...] Life at Songaia and elsewhere!
> 
>  
> 
> Dear Ones, 
> 
> This has been a week of celebration with it's laughter, tears and lotsd of
> hugs.  Here at Songaia, we have gathered several times to celebrate the life
> and death of our dear friend, Stan Crow.  On Saturday afternoon, our larger
> Songaia community circled with stories of how Stan has impacted our lives
> while he was alive and in his death. The ROP Journeys community hosted an
> open house in our common house to allow us to share with others. The
> sudden-ness of Stan's passing has brought us into the moment, we were
> unprepared for the news.  He is missed - his words of wisdom, his cooking,
> his walks around the community, his smile, his by-line - "I know you" - each
> of these and more have reminded us of his unique and unrepeatable life.  We
> are grateful to have known and loved him.
> 
> My mother, Eleanor Marian Hoxsie Perrin, died peacefully early on Thursday
> morning, November 19th, she was 93+.  She had been ill for 2-3 weeks of
> pancreatic cancer but passed away before she had pain, only mild discomfort.
> She died as she lived, WELL!  Our daughter Sandra and grand-daughter Ilaria
> visited Mom with me during the week of November 7th - 14th.  ALthough she
> was in hospice and was suppose to be letting go, we enjoyed two days of
> lively conversation and fun during the early part of our visit.  Mom loved
> the sun and would sit outdoors by her home whenever she could, even as the
> weather became cooler.  If there was sun to sit in, there she was!  As Sandy
> and I sat by her bedside one evening as the sun was going down in the West,
> Sandy moved Mom's bed to the window and slid into bed next to her. Together
> we watched the sun go down.   Mom was elated!  The following day we again
> moved her bed toward the setting sun and began singing with her.  We sang
> together for  30 minutes or so- laughing and crying at the same time.  The
> next day, we began a more quiet vigil and continued to share stories as Mom
> was awake, she would then drift off to sleep.   We said goodby on Saturday
> morning to return to Seattle.  I told Mom one more time that Fred and I
> loved her so very much.  She smiled up at me and said, " I love you, too and
> be sure to take good care of Fred".  Our time with her was precious.   She
> was a wonderful MOM - the best!
> 
> Back to Songaia.  Fred is experiencing much more weakness in his arms and
> more difficulty breathing.  Of course, he has the biPap machine at night and
> a "sip and puff" vent on his wheel chair during the day.  If you were to ask
> him how is is doing, he would say with a smile, "I can still sing"!   He was
> accepted into Hospice last week.  His breathing capacity is about 30% which
> makes him elegible for the hospice part of of our HMO.  This means more
> visits from the home health care nurse, social worker, and who-ever else we
> need.  Stan's death has been difficult for us all, Fred's identification
> with his death was unique as you can imagine.   He tells with delight that
> for the 3 Fridays before Stan's death, he (Stan) brought lunch to Fred while
> Marilyn and I were out doing the community shopping.  During lunch they just
> talked - since their usual relationship was "working" together on some
> project, these last days were special,  "BEING" together.  Our children and
> our larger Songaia community continue to be the best partners in our "Share
> the Care" team.  They come when needed and any other time as well.  Story
> telling is where it is at these days!  
> 
> We will keep in touch.  You are all loved, 
> 
> Nancy
> 
> 
> 
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