[Oe List ...] Witness: "Forgive Them, for They Know Not What They Do"

Sat Apr 7 14:31:52 EDT 2012

Jack,
david here --

Thanks for your thoughtful and powerful words.

As you know, my sister died in March.

Her adult kids asked me to "do the memorial" service for their mother.

I reminded the gathered family and friends that death, no matter how
carefully anticipated [in the particular], always catches us by
surprise.  I reminded everyone that there were words spoken, deed
done, and idea thought that we wish with all our heart we had not
thought, spoken, and done.  And there were words spoken and deeds done
we wish with all our hearts we had done.  I reminded the gathered that
in order to create a future without Mary Ann, we must say yes to this
reality and move on.

Then I reminded everyone that forgiveness is very concrete and very
practical -- it is not abstract words but concrete deeds.  I asked
everyone there to find at one person in the room, a go to that person
and tell them how they love, respect, care for them, and how filled
with joy they are to have that person in their life.  It was amazing
-- no one hesitated; they left their seats and found their "loved
ones."  I got to tell my brother, my sister-in-law, and my daughter
how much I loved them and how grateful I was they are a part of my
life.

When the group settled -- I looked around at all the joyful tears I
saw on the faces of community.  I asked, "how are you feeling right
now?"  "Good!"  "Tearfully joyful."  "So glad I came today."  "Great!"

I reminded them that what they were feeling was the feeling of
forgiveness.  They had just experience forgiveness!

And with that feeling we were ready to move to the "praise" phase and
we did.  For the next 90 minutes we all shared stories of my sister
Mary Ann.  My brother and I told what it meant to have this unique
human as a sister.  Friends told what it meant to have Mary Ann as a
friend.  Husband, children, grand-children all share with us how they
remembered Mary Ann, and they would always remember Mary Ann.

Then two of the grand-daughters, who are accomplished violinists,
played the theme from the PBS Civil War series, we pronounced the
grace and peace and went to that great tradition of a wonderful meal
prepared by the "ladies of the church."

Forgiveness may be a strange word in our time, but it is not a strange
experience --  and it is necessary for you and me to live our future
in joy and praise for those around us.

Thanks Jack -- always good to read (hear) your reflections).

love to all,
david

2012/4/6  <LAURELCG at aol.com>:
> Thank you, Jack. Thank you, Randy. Wonderful witness. Wonderful response.
>
> I've never appreciated out community more than now, looking back, looking
> forward.
>
> Blessings,
> Jann McGuire
>
> In a message dated 4/6/2012 4:46:56 A.M. Pacific Daylight Time,
> rcwmbw at yahoo.com writes:
>
> Dear Jack,
>
> I'm always impressed by your keen insight expressed in words.  But I'm even
> more impacted by your living of the resurrected life.  I have watched you
> and benefited from you over the years as you've lived this and, by your
> example, have encouraged others to go and do likewise.  I'm grateful--not to
> you, but to the mystery who called you forth from the tomb to live your
> resurrected life.  What a privilege, honor--and burden--to have been a
> part of a whole community of resurrected ones.
>
> I've been stewing, literally for the last several years, on the depth
> meaning of what we called the "moods" in the service of worship--humility,
> gratitude and compassion.  I hope someday to write something on these, but
> reading your witness made me think that all of these are necessary in order
> to forgive and be forgiven.  Humility is the crucifixion.  Gratitude is the
> resurrection.  Compassion is living the resurrected life.  For better or
> worse, these are not once and for all.  How many times must we be crucified
> and resurrected, only to be crucified and resurrected again?
>
> I saw a video from last evening of the Pope particpating in the Maundy
> Thursday food-washing service.  There he was with basin and towel in
> hand, garbed in his ecclesiastical robes, which are the symbol of power and
> authority in the Catholic Church.  I wondered what might have been the
> impact if the Pope, even with his more than 80-year old body, had, as Jesus
> did, stripped down to his loin cloth and got on his hands and knees under
> the table to symbolize that the role of the church, as a community of the
> forgiven rather than an institutional monolith, is to serve a suffering
> world.
>
> Today is Good Friday.  Given what we commemorate that happened on
> this occasion 2,000 years ago, we call it "good" Friday only because we see
> it looking back through the resurrection.  We read the last chapter first
> and know how the story ends.  We know that there is no resurrection without
> a crucifixion.
>
> So, you go have yourself a "good" Friday.  And, by the way, your sins are
> forgiven.
>
> Grace and peace from your colleague,
> Randy
>
> "Listen to what is emerging from yourself to the course of being in the
> world; not to be supported by it, but to bring it to reality as it desires."
> -Martin Buber (adapted)
> From: Jack Gilles <icabombay at igc.org>
> To: Order Ecumenical Community <oe at wedgeblade.net>
> Sent: Thursday, April 5, 2012 8:22 PM
> Subject: [Oe List ...] Witness: "Forgive Them, for They Know Not What They
> Do"
>
> These words, spoken by Jesus on the cross just before he died have been at
> the heart of the story of the crucifixion and the resurrection.  But what is
> 'forgiveness' and what is the relationship to the resurrection?  I think
> that without these words the resurrection loses its significance.
>
> There is a lot of talk about how we should forgive people who have offended
> us.  Like "cheap grace", the words often spoken "I forgive you" are not
> coming from the same place Jesus was when he spoke these words.  We often
> say something like "I forgive you" when in reality we really do not.  We may
> feel these words will get a situation back to normal, bring a nasty
> situation to a conclusion, or perhaps we feel the person really didn't mean
> what they said or did, especially if they had had a different context.  So a
> situation may become better, or a person feel better with these words, but
> they are not what Jesus was pointing with his words.
>
> Non of us have been crucified, but we may have been falsely accused, had
> friends or even family abandon us, been left alone to face a situation we
> should not have had to face.  But resurrection only comes through
> forgiveness.
>
> Let me try and ground that in a real situation.  Nothing can be more soul
> wrenching than a divorce.  Having gone through one I know that the pain can
> be intense.  But this is not about my divorce, for I was fortunate to have a
> great human being with whom I went through a great transition, and although
> it was painful for both, neither of us ever became mean or accusative toward
> the other.  But I know of situations that were not.  What happens when you
> are lied to, lied about, deceived, falsely accused and vilified and those
> words and accusations used to try and turn friends and family against you?
>
> Forgiveness is not justifying or excusing behavior, it is not saying what
> was done is okay (I can rise above this), it is not even feeling pity or
> sorrow for the other's  brokenness and deceit.
>
> Forgiveness is first and foremost recognizing that this is about you, not
> the other.  It is about God, not the perpetrator.  Your "resurrection"
> depends upon it.  Forgiveness means you take all that has been done to you
> and redeem it, you know that your soul is sanctified when you embrace the
> event, embrace the pain and embrace the other as your path.
>
> In a the case of a divorce like I spoke about, we can celebrate the divorce,
> but not simply because it is over, you won and life has become a new normal
> without surprises and pain.  We celebrate it because you have a purified
> center, you have a renewed sense of self-worth and you understand how the
> depths of pain and deceit can be the instruments of greatness for your own
> spirit.  You give thanks for the love of Being who has given you a
> "blessing" in the form of a divorce.
>
> With the forgiveness the resurrection becomes possible.  The embrace of the
> cross, it's evil, creates the open tomb.
>
> So, "Let us forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass
> against us."
>
> Let us embrace the cross of the life we have been given and participate in
> the universal resurrection, the Truth of life, now and forever.
>
> Jack Gilles
>
>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> OE mailing list
> OE at wedgeblade.net
> http://wedgeblade.net/mailman/listinfo/oe_wedgeblade.net
>
>
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> OE mailing list
> OE at wedgeblade.net
> http://wedgeblade.net/mailman/listinfo/oe_wedgeblade.net
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> OE mailing list
> OE at wedgeblade.net
> http://wedgeblade.net/mailman/listinfo/oe_wedgeblade.net
>

-- 
Margaret and David Scott
Flathead Valley College